Every year when the holidays come around, something happens inside of us.
The lights get brighter, the music gets softer, families start gathering, and everywhere you look people seem to be holding hands, smiling, or talking about love. And for many of us, that’s when the longing hits the hardest. We want love. We want connection. We want someone to hold us, appreciate us, and choose us.
But on her “Bedtime Talk” podcast, Ya Girl Renae shared a truth that hit deep:
Before you ever receive love from another person, you have to know and trust that you are loved by God first.
This message is powerful. And for some people, it’s exactly what their heart has been needing to hear.
Why We Search So Hard for Love During the Holidays
The holiday season has a way of magnifying everything—your joy, your memories, and yes, even your loneliness. You start reflecting on who’s missing, who you lost, who walked away, or who never showed up. Social media makes it even harder because you see couples posting pictures, families laughing together, and people opening gifts with big smiles.
But God wants you to understand something important:
Your value is not measured by who chooses you.
Your worth is not decided by who stays or who leaves.
You are already loved. You were loved first by God.
God’s Love Comes Before Any Other Blessing
Ya Girl Renae explained it beautifully:
Before God gives you a spouse, a relationship, a blessing, a friendship, a new opportunity, or anything valuable — He wants you grounded in His love first.
Why?
Because if you don’t know who you are in God…
If you don’t know how loved you already are…
If you don’t understand your value…
Then you will attach your heart to anybody who shows you a little attention.
You’ll settle for relationships that drain you.
You’ll stay in situations where you’re tolerated, not valued.
You’ll accept love that’s beneath what God intended for you.
But when you understand that God loves you deeply, completely, and without conditions, everything changes. You stop chasing people. You stop begging for affection. You stop allowing the wrong voices to speak into your life.
And you gain a peace that only comes from heaven.
Perfect Peace Starts With a Mind Stayed on God
On the podcast, Renae reminded everyone of Isaiah 26:3 (NIV):
“You will keep in perfect peace
those whose minds are steadfast,
because they trust in you.”
God doesn’t want your mind overwhelmed, stressed, or anxious during the holidays.
He doesn’t want you on social media comparing your life to others.
He doesn’t want you crying at night because someone didn’t choose you.
He wants you to have perfect peace—and that peace comes when you shift your focus back to Him.
God’s Love Makes You Whole, Not People
People can love you, but they can’t complete you.
People can care for you, but they can’t fill every empty place.
People can support you, but they can’t heal the wounds you’ve been carrying.
Only God can do that.
And when you know God loves you, you stop looking for other people to fill the spaces only He can fill.
This Season, Choose to Rest in God’s Love
Before you hope for a relationship…
Before you wish for companionship…
Before you pray for someone to hold you…
Know this: You are already held.
You are already seen.
You are already loved — deeply, fully, and forever — by God.
Let His love be the foundation.
Let His peace be the covering.
Let His presence be the comfort you lean on during this holiday season.
Because once you know who you are in God, the right love — the healthy love — will find you in due time. And it will be a blessing, not a burden.
