I’m in my 50s, so let me start with where my head’s at. Back in my era, dating in the workplace was a big no. Not a “maybe keep it quiet” no—an actual “don’t do it, period” because it was a conflict of interest. We didn’t want our bosses seeing us working and dating at the same time, because it looked like it interfered with our work and, honestly, sometimes it did. That was the vibe: keep your personal life far away from your paycheck. Now I’m looking around and wondering what’s going on in this time. Is it okay now that people are dating at work like it’s no big deal?

Here’s what has me asking. There’s a Wendy’s I know where my brother was actually dating the manager while he was just a regular crew member. He wasn’t some shift lead or anything—just a crew member, doing the regular grind. And it wasn’t secretive. They didn’t act like they had to hide it in the parking lot or whisper about it over the fryers. It was out in the open enough that I knew, other folks knew, and no one seemed to be sneaking around. So I’m sitting here like: is that okay now? Is that what Wendy’s is allowed? Is that what McDonald’s is allowed? Are companies okay allowing that these days?

Because where I’m from, that is textbook conflict of interest. In my time, it was. You date your boss, or your boss dates you, and suddenly everything looks slanted. Did you get that shift because you earned it, or because you’re dating the manager? Did someone else get their hours cut because they’re not part of that situation? Even if nobody’s trying to be shady, people will look at it sideways. It messes with trust. Morale dips. Folks start thinking the schedule is written in hearts and smiley faces instead of fairness.

But at the same time, I can’t ignore what I’m seeing now. It doesn’t seem to be that way in a lot of places. I’m not saying everywhere, I’m not saying there aren’t rules, but I am saying I see couples at work who aren’t ducking behind the soda machine. It’s just… happening. And maybe that’s because times changed. People meet where they spend time, and most of us spend a whole lot of time at work. It’s not like there’s a separate dating world for everyone to clock into after their shift. You’re side by side dropping fries, wiping tables, surviving the dinner rush—emotions happen.

Still, power is power. A manager dating someone on their crew? That’s not just two equals flirting over Frostys. That’s a person who writes the schedule, gives evaluations, calls out discipline, approving time off… and someone who depends on all those decisions to pay rent. You can call it love, you can call it chemistry, but you can’t act like that power imbalance isn’t sitting right there at the register. Even if both people are good people, it only takes one moment—a disagreement, a breakup, a jealous coworker—to turn the whole store into a mess.

What gets me about my brother’s situation is how normal it looked. No hush-hush, no “don’t tell anyone we grabbed a burger after shift,” just out there like it’s fine. And maybe it is at that location. Maybe the company handbook says it’s allowed if you tell HR, or if the manager doesn’t manage your schedule, or if one of you moves to another store. I don’t know the fine print, I’m just telling you what I saw: they didn’t make it seem like it was a secretive thing, and nobody seemed shocked. That’s a shift from my era, for sure.

So I’ve got questions, and I’m tossing them to y’all. Is that what Wendy’s allows? Is that what McDonald’s allows? Are companies okay allowing this now? I know some places are strict—no dating if one person manages the other, no dating in the same chain of command, mandatory disclosure, all that. But other places, especially fast food and retail, I keep hearing “As long as it doesn’t affect the job” and “We don’t get involved in personal relationships.” Which sounds fine on paper until someone’s hours magically change or a write-up appears after a breakup.

Here’s my bottom line. I’m not hating on love. People find each other where they find each other. But let’s not act like there’s no conflict of interest just because it’s 2025 and we’ve all gotten more casual about everything. If you’re a manager, and you’re dating someone on your crew, you’re playing with fire unless there are real guardrails—like moving one of you to another store, or taking scheduling and performance decisions out of your hands. And if you’re the crew member dating up, be honest about whether it’s helping you today and hurting the whole team tomorrow. Because the team will feel it. Trust me, they will.

In my time, we kept that wall solid: work is work, dating is dating. Maybe the wall has a door in it now. But if we’re going to use that door, we should at least agree on the rules of the hallway. Right now, from what I’m seeing at certain places, the rules feel fuzzy. My brother’s situation at that Wendy’s is just one example, but it’s enough to make me wonder if we’ve traded “don’t do it” for “do what you want, and hope it doesn’t blow up the schedule.” Maybe that works. Maybe it doesn’t. I’m genuinely asking.

So tell me—what are you seeing where you work? Is it open season, or is it still a “nope, not here” kind of thing? Is it okay now, or are we just pretending the old problems don’t still exist? Because in my book, conflict of interest didn’t disappear; we just got better at ignoring it. — John

Beyonce | Please Leave Her Children Alone…

It’s really sad to me that people will attack someone’s children simply because they don’t agree with the parent’s lifestyle, career choices, beliefs, or who they are as a person. At the end of the day, it’s still wrong. You’re not a better person because you’re sitting online making fun of somebody else’s child.

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